I Want My Rib Back, Rib Back, Rib Back Baby

Posted by on May 9, 2011 in Daily Blog | Comments Off

For the past two weeks I have been nursing a couple of broken ribs. This is the third time I have broke ribs, and probably the most ridiculous.

First Incident: Running the Gauley River in a friends boat. The primary method for operating a raft on the Gauley is a paddle rig. Before every trip the guide will give the regular schpeel that you should always have on hand on the top of the T-grip of the paddle. This is not only way to properly operate a paddle, but it also prevents spearing fellow passengers with the T-grip. 3/4’s of the way down the river the boat gets taco’d (folded) in a hole. The one guy who did not listen to the little introductory talk shoves a paddle in my rib. The following day I took a nice little whipper on one of the classic climbs in the New River Gorge and finished the job.

Second Incident: I am on a new bike, purchased by the insurance company (another story), riding on one of my regular rides, cruising one of the flatter sections. I hit a small lip in the trail and find myself on my back watching my bike soar into the bushes. It takes me a moment to get up, and my hand hurts like hell. When I tried to ride again I couldn’t weight my hands on the handle bars. It wasn’t till about mile 5 on the hike out that I realized breathing was not quite the auto command activity it used to be. End result, two broken ribs and a broken hand. There went the season.

Third incident: So, now that I am a father of young children, I need an activity that does not impact family time too much. For about a year now a good buddy of mine has been playing hockey in the local rec league. He keeps trying to get me on the ice. Finally I relent. What the heck. I am 40. It seems like time to take up a new game, and I haven’t played a team sport in years. It worked out well. Games started after the kids went to bed and the cardio work is great.

I hadn’t been skating in about 20 years and getting back on the ice was more challenging than I thought it would be. Fortunately they make you wear all those pads and protective gear. You can’t feel anything in that stuff. Early on I fell to the ice, got up, skated 10 feet before I knew someone from my own team had been underneath me.

Anyway, toward the end of the season I had gotten better and was skating much more aggressively. I started doing long diving defensive slides on the ice, you know, because in those are necessary moves in Rec Hockey. We were down to the last three games of the season. They started Thursday night and ended on Saturday night. Thursday night I dove 3 times, and the next day I knew I had buggered the ribs pretty good. I taped up the ribs for the next two games but as we entered the playoffs getting out of bed was a chore. I tried to put everything in persepective. THis is REC HOCKEY. Who is going to know if I played. Besides, given our record for the regular season we weren’t gonna go very far in the playoffs (even if there were only 3 other teams).

SO, I decided to stay off the Ice. My team won the first game, even without me. And they went on to win the playoffs and I didn’t get to play. On the plus side I can sneeze without screaming in pain and nobody had to face shoving a rib through my lung.